I have always prided myself on being an experienced gamer. When I was 5 years old, my father bought a PC for our home, and I became acquainted with video games. From GameBoy to Switch, from Xbox360 to PS4, these consoles accompanied me at different stages of my growth, becoming an indispensable memory of my youth.
The natural disasters of 2020 made it difficult to purchase physical games, so I hacked my Switch. I thought that countless free games would bring me more joy, but instead, I fell into the depths of "digital erectile dysfunction."
I lost interest in games and even sold all my gaming devices.
It wasn't until last year when Lena gifted me a PS5 that my symptoms of "digital erectile dysfunction" began to improve.
As of today, I have completed a total of 52 games on the PS5, with 21 of them earning platinum trophies (i.e., completing all achievements in the game). I still spend some time gaming every day, enjoying it greatly, and I can say I've completely bid farewell to "digital erectile dysfunction."
This article will share my insights on treating "digital erectile dysfunction."
1. Don't Have Too Many Choices#
Many game companies are now promoting subscription-based gaming, such as Microsoft's XGP and Sony's PS+. By paying a small fee each month, you can access an entire game library.
It sounds great, but having too many choices is not necessarily a good thing. You can easily skim through options, wasting a lot of time selecting games.
Human nature is always greedy; your subconscious will suggest, "There are better options in the library." Moreover, having already spent real money on a subscription service, if you don't play several games, wouldn't that be a loss? Therefore, even if you find a game you like, you may struggle to immerse yourself in it, and it can easily end up unfinished.
As a result, the time spent downloading games far exceeds the time spent playing them.
Psychologists refer to this phenomenon as the "paradox of choice." Too many options can increase decision fatigue and decrease satisfaction.
My advice is to limit your choices; play one game at a time and switch to a new one only after completing it. Also, try to avoid subscription-based games and instead opt for carefully selected individual purchases. Over time, the quality of your gaming experience will significantly improve.
2. Find Motivation Beyond Gaming#
Completing game achievements is a good choice. When I encounter a game I like, I make sure to complete every achievement in it. Pursuing achievements not only gives me more motivation but also helps me fully understand the game, making my spending feel more worthwhile.
After finishing a game, I always write some reviews, insights, or guides. Over time, I have received some positive feedback and readers, and this positive reinforcement encourages me to savor other games more seriously.
Additionally, in my city, there are some offline gaming gatherings that I occasionally attend. These gatherings often host competitions, such as Street Fighter tournaments or Mario Kart races. Increasing my interactions with other players and enhancing my sense of participation can effectively alleviate the symptoms of "digital erectile dysfunction."
3. Reduce Fragmented Time and Make Gaming Time Cohesive#
I have always believed in one principle: the human brain is inherently unsuited for multitasking; at any given moment, a person's mind can only focus on one thing.
Although today's PCs are powerful enough and console platforms are gradually declining, I still choose to play games on console platforms, primarily because consoles can only play games.
This statement may seem simple, but it is crucial. When playing games on a PC, I can easily open a webpage to check posts or watch streams while waiting for a game to load. Or, while playing, I might pick up my phone to scroll through TikTok or check Weibo. By the time I realize it, the joy of gaming has already been diluted (after all, watching videos is more interesting).
Once distracted, I can no longer continue playing the game. So whenever I game, I throw my phone far away. By avoiding distractions, I can focus on the game.
4. Create Your Own Gaming Space#
In Australia, there is a culture called "Man's Cave," which literally translates to "man's cave." Men there create their own independent spaces, away from the hustle and bustle, to focus on their passions (this is also the source of our site's domain, leonscave).
For many people striving in big cities, having a gaming space that belongs solely to them may seem overly extravagant. However, I strongly recommend improving your gaming environment. I used to play games on an outdated 1080P monitor, but later upgraded to a 4K 32-inch high-refresh-rate gaming screen and added a sound system. The gaming experience significantly improved, and I became more willing to play.
Even if your budget is limited, you can start small: change to a comfortable chair, tidy up your desk, or adjust the lighting, all of which can greatly enhance the sense of ritual in gaming.
You don't need expensive equipment; just a clear "space that belongs to you."
5. Generously Acknowledge That You Are "Older"#
"Wanting to buy osmanthus flowers and drink wine, is never like the youthful play." Regardless of whether through intrinsic motivation or external forces, one undeniable fact remains: we are indeed "older."
This "aging" is not related to age but rather to mindset.
There are too many things in life that require our attention, making it difficult to naturally give ourselves ample time for leisure and entertainment. If something does not yield quick results, we feel anxious and perceive time as wasted.
At this point, not only can "digital erectile dysfunction" occur, but there may also be "reading erectile dysfunction," "creative erectile dysfunction," or "other erectile dysfunctions"… They are essentially a form of dilemma.
There are many things in this world that are more enjoyable than gaming; gaming is just one way to please ourselves.
More importantly, we need to understand the changes within ourselves and learn how to please ourselves.
Let go of those aspirations to "stand out," and perhaps then we can truly break free from "digital erectile dysfunction."
In Conclusion: Gaming is a Way to Life#
I believe that the process of healing "digital erectile dysfunction" is not about becoming addicted to games again, but about rediscovering the ability to love, focus, and be at peace with oneself.
Gaming has never been the opposite of life; on the contrary, it can be a way to understand life and return to oneself.
On a leisurely afternoon, opening a game and immersing oneself in it like in childhood, feeling joy—nothing more, and that is enough.